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How can a man be assertive in a relationship: 9 ways to be assertive with your girlfriend.

man be assertive in a relationship

What does assertive male mean

A man can be assertive in a relationship by speaking up for himself whenever he is disrespected. You can teach your woman how to treat you. Effective communication is the key to healthy relationships.

Now, let me explain what being assertive is and what it is not. Most people confuse assertiveness with being aggressive, and those are two different things. The other form of communication is passiveness, which is also detrimental to relationships.

Being assertive means communicating your needs, ideas, and feelings unapologetically while also respecting the opinions of others. This is an effective form of communication because it allows you to be yourself while respecting your partner. Assertiveness in a relationship creates a win-win situation.

On the other hand, being aggressive shows selfishness because you try to get your needs met without caring about other people’s feelings. Being aggressive also means you forcefully impose your opinions on others and ignore what they say. This is ineffective because it doesn’t allow free communication.

Being passive means meeting your partner’s needs at your own expense. You may think she will like you more for doing this, but it will only lead to resentment. You may try to make your woman happy while secretly resent her.

Here is how a man can be assertive in a relationship:

    1. The thing that makes a man be assertive in a relationship is setting boundaries.

Just because you are in a relationship doesn’t mean you have to hide your individuality. You must still be the same man and love what you love and hate what you hate.

A woman has to know the things you cannot accept. If your girlfriend or wife spends too much money on your credit card, you can sit her down and politely ask her to stop. You don’t have to be loud or aggressive about it. If she doesn’t comply, never be afraid to let her go.

A passive guy, on the other hand, would allow a woman to milk him off and keep his mouth shut while the anger pins up inside. This will lead him to explode or even beat her up.

Drawing the line makes a man be assertive in a relationship because it is a sign of masculinity.

Also read: A guide to setting healthy boundaries.

        2. Directness makes a man be assertive in a relationship.

Being direct can make a man be assertive in a relationship because when you say exactly how you feel instead of what you think your partner wants to hear, you will come off as authentic.

When you try to be friendly instead of genuine, you will come off as weak, which is the last thing a woman wants. Being direct is a sign of honesty. You are in a toxic relationship if you are not allowed to express your authentic self or feelings.

        3. Being yourself is what makes a man be assertive in a relationship.

You can never be assertive if you are not true to yourself. If you must constantly try to be someone you are not to make your woman like you, you shouldn’t be in that relationship.

When you are authentic, you understand that you don’t have to act as your woman or anyone wants you to. A real woman will like you for being yourself, but a toxic woman will try to change you into someone you are not.

Just because you are in a relationship doesn’t mean you must adjust your personality or lifestyle.

Being yourself is more challenging than it sounds because it takes courage. When you have an authentic character, people will judge you harshly, and in most cases, you will feel like an outcast, but authenticity is the key to your psychological well-being.

         4. Not being afraid to be single makes a man be more assertive in a relationship.

Most men allow women to walk over them because they fear being single. They are worried that the woman might leave if they speak up against disrespect.

You can only call yourself an authentic man once you learn to enjoy your own company.

When you are okay with being single, you can attract many women because women don’t like needy men. You will never find one if you are actively looking for a girlfriend.

When I was actively searching for a relationship, I was rejected by every girl I spoke to because I was too nice. It is impossible to be assertive when you are the one who is begging for a relationship, and without assertiveness, you will come off as a nice guy, and you will be rejected.

When I finally stopped searching for a relationship and was enjoying my life alone, girls started to approach me. It’s funny that they don’t want you when you want them, and when you stop caring and focus on yourself, they come to you.

being okay with being single makes a man be assertive in a relationship, as you will not be begging a woman to like him or not to leave you

         5. Having calm body language makes a man be assertive in a relationship.

Body language is crucial because females can tell that you are an assertive guy by looking at how you carry yourself. Calm body language makes you appear confident yet welcoming. 

Having relaxed body language is essential because it makes you appear approachable. After all, being too intimidating may push some girls away.

If you want to convey to girls that you are assertive, you must carry yourself in a way that shows you are friendly but not a pushover.

Knowing how to use body language properly can make a man be assertive in a relationship.

          6. Staying logical can make a man be assertive in a relationship.

The other thing that can make a man be assertive in a relationship is that he can control his emotions. I know you think I’m being toxic, but I’m not saying you shouldn’t have feelings, but you must learn how to control them.

Just because a woman comes up to you yelling doesn’t mean you have to yell back. You may have the urge to shout at her, but you must react calmly; this is the only way to calm her down.

Although real men may appear unemotional, that is not true; they don’t respond to their emotions like the average man. This is the reason why a man needs to have an outlet where he can express his feelings.

          7. Knowing yourself is what makes a man assertive.

Knowing yourself makes man be assertive in a relationship because self-knowledge shows you know your worth.

If you have taken time and look at yourself in the mirror, you will become more self-aware, allowing you to communicate from your core values.

Taking your time to develop self-awareness will naturally raise your self-esteem, and as a result, it will become easier to assert yourself.

         8. Practicing to say no can make a man be assertive in a relationship.

If you grew up being a people pleaser, it can be hard to say no. If you always say yes, you will have too much on your plate, which may lead to stress and an inability to meet your goals.

When you say yes but know inside you should have said no, you will secretly resent your partner.

Being able to say no makes a be man assertive in a relationship because it shows his limits.

       9. Being a good listener is what makes a man assertive.

Being a good listener makes a man be assertive in a relationship because effective communication involves listening. Assertiveness is about respecting other people’s views; you can only do that if you are a good listener.

If all you do is talk about yourself and distract others while they are, that is not what assertiveness means. When you are assertive, you can listen to what others say, and then you respond respectfully.

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